RIP Rurouni

Note: This post will probably sound somewhat silly to some, but hey, it's my storage site, so I don't really care.

Rurouni was my beta fish. He was a beautiful red-maroon color, with graceful sweeping fins and a really cool neck rough that he flared whenever he was startled or angry. Hubby got him for my for our second Valentine's day together, back during our sophomore year of college. He pulled beautiful peach-pink roses out of the fridge and handed them to me along with a fish scooper. He then handed me a sack of rocks and set a bowl on the counter, and then pulled out Rurouni. This was months before we broke up for a while. During that break up time, I still had Rurouni (obviously) and he got to hear me unburden myself when my friends were tired of hearing it (not that I blame them...I talk through things, its how I cope, so sometimes my friends need a break from listening to me and I still just need to talk, even when the only one listening is a fish). Yes I know he was just a fish, but I tend towards anthropomorphizing things and critters. So to me, Rurouni was a good friend-fish and was a constant during a turbulent time. Not to mention he always watched me whenever I was talking to him...kinda creepy at first, but I got used to it, and it made me feel like I actually was talking to someone.

Anyways, he died this weekend while we were away. I'm not sure what to do with him (yes, he's still in his bowl) because I had hoped he'd make it to our first house with us, so that I could bury him in our garden when he died. I don't want to just flush him, but I don't have a potted plant big enough to bury him in.

So why all this fuss over a fish? Because he was a pet who meant more to me than just something to take care of. Because pets become family, even when they're only concerned with getting fresh water, food, and pooping. Because the little deaths in life prepare us for the bigger deaths in live.

And because for the past 3 years and 9 months Rurouni has been a constant in my life, and now he's gone.